Unbelievably, October is here already!  This is both good and bad.    Bad because it means I’ve only seven weeks to write the next book and I haven’t written a word yet.  (Why do I do this to myself every time?  I suppose I must need the adrenalin rush, but I really wish I could break myself of the habit.) But good because it means the culmination of all this celebration when my 50th book, Last-Minute Proposal, hits the shelves at last.  I’ve been making such a fuss about it all year that I’ve got blasé about the whole idea now, but when I stop and think about having written 50 books, it is quite mind-blowing.  How on earth did I manage to write all those books???  Answer: clearly, with a lot of adrenalin rushes! 

I certainly never thought I would end up writing this many when my first book, A Sweeter Prejudice, was published in 1991.  In fact, I didn’t really think about what was doing at all.  Having woken up one day deciding to do a PhD in medieval history, and having heard that there was lots of money to be had in writing romance, my plan was to knock out a few books to fund my studies.  I had no idea how difficult it would be, or how long it would take to actually make any money – one of the benefits of doing no research!  If I’d known how chancy the whole business was, I might never have started.  As it was, I set off in blissful ignorance and after a couple of abortive efforts belatedly decided to try reading a book on how to write romance. I don’t remember the exact title, but I have a feeling it was by Mary Wibberley.  Anyway, it was very helpful, and my next attempt got a very positive response from Mills & Boon, who suggested I start afresh with a completely new story. 

I can’t now remember the exact sequence of events, but that must have been in l988 – yikes, 20 years ago! At the time, I was working in London for an organisation called Operation Raleigh – the best job I ever had, if possibly the worst paid – and I used to turn down all invitations to go out to write in the evenings and at weekends on an electric typewriter in the kitchen. How times have changed!  It’s hard to imagine how self-disciplined I was then when I’m so weak-willed and self-indulgent now ... I’m always out now, usually complaining about how I never have any time to write my book!

 I know I waited a long time for a response when I eventually sent off that first  manuscript, but have no idea now whether that was before or after I went to Cameroon to help run an expedition for five months.  I certainly had to revise the story, and presumably there was more waiting after that, but I do remember getting the letter of acceptance on 23rd December 1989.  By that time I was working as a secretary on the foreign newsdesk of The Observer and I came home to find the letter on the mat.  I was due to join my family in Scotland for Christmas, and made the mistake of ringing to tell them the good news.  They promptly went out and celebrated without me, and were so hung over when I arrived the next day that no one felt like another party!  I’ve always felt rather cheated of my ‘first book’ celebrations as a result, but am making up for it with a champagne cocktail party in a couple of weeks to mark my 50th.  After that, I may not want to hear the word ‘fifty’ again for a while! 

I’m not sure A Sweeter Prejudice would be accepted if I submitted it now, but I picked it up the other day to scan the cover, and read the first few pages, and I have to say it wasn’t nearly as bad as I’d remembered.  Even I can see that my voice is there, and I’d clearly put in some emotional conflict without knowing what it was, but I didn’t really have a clue what I was doing.  The first time writing really clicked for me was in the first draft of Woman at Willagong Creek, my third book.  I have a vivid memory of sitting in the kitchen, trying to write the scene where Guy and Olivia agree on a marriage of convenience, and realising that I’d got it the wrong way round.  Originally, it was Guy’s idea, but the moment I thought, ‘no, she’s got to ask him to marry her,’ the story took off, and 49 books later, that scene is still one of my favourites. 

I probably thought I knew how to do it then … WRONG!  Some books have come easily, some have been a real struggle.  Some have worked, and some haven’t.  In some ways, the more I write, the less confidence I have in what I’m doing. Technically, I’m probably a better writer now than I was when I started, but inevitably my writing isn’t as fresh.  I can remember every one of my fifty heroes and fifty heroines, though, and I like to imagine my favourites living happily together ten, fifteen, twenty years down the line, and growing older with me!

Now that Last-Minute Proposal is out, I’ll be winding the website celebrations down, although the blog will still be here, minus lovely guests and balloons.  I’ll be announcing the results of the Pick Your Own survey next time, so do come back then if you’d like to know exactly what I’ll be writing when I’ve finished this current book ... which won’t be any time soon unless I get on with it right now!